Relationships: Last a Lifetime

Stepping into a new position brought along a few surprises. People I grew up with wandered into my office, smiling a bit in surprise, and content to greet an old friend. I struggled with a few meetings, laughed through others, and cried after still more. My life was dancing before my very eyes, and I struggled with the reality of facing all those years. I knew when I focused on the mass of files stacked on every bare inch of my desk that I was in for a few surprises. The surprises came with familiar faces and well-known names.

An electrician who set our barn on fire in childhood grumbled at the thought of my doing his accounting, but left smiling, trusting me with his prized numbers. Another business owner parked in front of my desk to ask me questions and later left me his accounting. A chef, ripped through my office with purpose and poise, if not grace, leaving a wake of tumbled pencil holders, only to return and ask me a favor. The peer of my parents grumbled about my presence while begging me to explain depreciation to him, and reluctantly accepted my explanation, insisting later that I take care of his taxes.

Each understood the dynamic presented, suffered the excruciating principles, and accepted the concept of meeting progress at the expense of a bit of privacy. But, there was one more.

A treasure left for a Monday afternoon, when my day had gone awry, and my life wrapped tightly around a momentary crisis, he strolled into the office slowly, appearing lost. I greeted him with a smile. An old friend, one who lived just down the street. It had been his fault I fell off the horse, nearly breaking my arm when I was 7. His curls had been a source of mass frustration when my own hair tumbled in straight lengths down my back. I can't remember when I didn't know him.

"Where's my accountant?" He asked in confusion.

"He left. He relocated up north somewhere." I smiled understanding. "Can I help you?" I offered gently.

"I need some help with my payroll?" He answered slowly.

I handed him a folder and indicated it was done. He looked at the folder and said, "My wife always did it." "She had it well organized." I answered, smiling back at him. "It made it very easy to figure the numbers and organize everything."

He stared at the floor. I gathered the rest of his accounting, placed the important papers in a folder for him to take with him, and opened a page of numbered directions. "This will help you get things together so I can do the Fiscal Year books." I explained, pointing to the list.

"I don't know if I can do it." He spoke softly. I understood. "She always did that for me."

"If you need help, my number is at the top of the page, I'll come out and help you get it together." I smiled, encouraging him.

"I miss her," He breathed. His voice soft and weakened.

"It's tough, but I know you'll get through this." I smiled, my own eyes filling up with tears, for his loss. "You're not alone, my friend. You have many shoulders to lean on, and as much help as you need to get through this time. I'm there for you." I want to reach over and tussle the curls I was once so jealous of. But I sit poised behind my desk.

As he left, I walked him to the door, patted his shoulder, and gave him a caring hug, the kind only old friends are allowed. Tears dripped down my cheeks as I watched him walk to the truck, and disappear down the street. Youth ebbed that moment, and an understanding that requires years of experience erupted through the calm, breaking the silence in a heart felt sob as I turned back to my desk.

His life partner was gone, he was alone, the lone wolf walking through the forest that is life, without the one he cared more about than himself, for many years. Suddenly, the job didn't matter. My career made no difference at all. I only wanted to share a moment of living with my family, a bit of hope with someone around me, and the day. Just one more day. I prayed for a day without loss, or pain, or crisis, for my friend. I prayed for a moment of loving memory that would bring a smile to his lonely face.

I long to see the freckles crinkle into a grin, one more time.

Copyright © 2005 ? Jan Verhoeff

Jan Verhoeff brings heart to the center of business. A staple of relationships, the heart and soul are required for building a successful business. Visit her at eBiz Brand Performance.

Relationship Advice: Wash that (Bad) Man Out of Your Hair

Stuck on a guy who cheats on you? Lies? Claims he loves you but can't... Read More

Unfaithfulness

AS I STARED at the sunset, I marveled at its beauty. The scenario got me... Read More

Relationship Conflict: Lock Horns or Lock Arms

One of my favorite comic strips growing up was "The Lockhorns." Not so much because... Read More

Building the Bond in Your Relationship

A bond (relationship wise) is when two people have a connection. Being attracted to each... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: How to Get ?All A?s? in Couples Communication

Mark Twain once said that he believed it was "God's great cosmic joke on humanity... Read More

Swinging! Will My Spouse Be Interested?

How does one talk his/her spouse into living the Swinging Lifestyle?More importantly, why would you... Read More

For Better Or Worse

For Better or WorseI was in the middle of a conversation the other evening with... Read More

You are Killing US with YOUR Jealousy

Hey all, I feel that need to reach out and touch someone. So here I... Read More

Denial Is Not A River In Egypt

Original it ain't, but it still merits repetition: "Denial is not a river in Egypt".... Read More

Religious Dating - Traditions and Values

Dating someone with the same religious beliefs as you, can often result in a rewarding... Read More

Rescue and Rebuild Your Relationship: 7 Tips to Make it Work

Create Time To Share And Time On Your Own.Establish time to spend together and time... Read More

True Friendships - How to Get True Friends and Friendships

True Friendship - RecognitionHow can we find true friendships in this fast and selfish world?... Read More

All About Soul Mates

1. How do I know when I've met my Soul Mate?There will be an instantaneous... Read More

Relationship Failing? Consider Your Ways

WhenWe all need to consider our ways. So many times we operate in a state... Read More

The Tablet of Venus

In the 17th century, divination devices called The Tablets of Fate were sold on the... Read More

Calming the Storm In Your Relationship

IntroductionConflict in relationships is inevitable. Put two men together with their own sets of needs,... Read More

Add Trust To Your Relationship

Trust is something that is important to every single relationship you have. No matter if... Read More

Relationship Advice: How to Make a Genuine Apology

A genuine apology contains at least four elements: apology, acknowledgment, forgiveness and repentance.Let's take a... Read More

Cheating Spouse: 7 Legitimate Motives for Spying

Should you spy on your cheating husband or wife? You believe you see signs of... Read More

The Healing Power of Forgiveness

People who experience bad health often have major league forgiveness issues in their lives. When... Read More

Why Doesnt She Leave Him?

It's very easy to look, from the outside, at another woman's unhappy relationship and ask:... Read More

Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen After Wife Gets MBA

"Hesh, where is your business plan?" It was a question I expected from my banker,... Read More

Women and Men: Never The Twain Shall Meet

"Dear Happy Guy,"I just don't understand men. Last night I was sitting at the kitchen... Read More

You Have to Read Heartbreak Rescue Just For You

"The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth which men... Read More

The Power of Authenticity

How "powerful" are you?Do you ever cover up how you genuinely feel? Do you ever... Read More

Hunter and Gatherer

Deep down, we haven't evolved as much as we would like to believe. Like the... Read More

Why Anger is Essential to Healthy Relationships

Many of us have some very definite ideas about anger. We see anger as destructive... Read More

Relationship Problems Begin With Poor Communication

Many relationship problems often begin with poor communication. Many couples often feel that their partner... Read More

Relationship Arguments - 7 Ways to Heal Past Hurts

Q: I've read that you are never supposed to bring up the past in a... Read More

Love is not Something you Say, Its Something you Do

Many have problems with communication and using that "love" word. We all do need to... Read More

Emotional Investments

It is a given truth that there are people out there in the world, married... Read More

Discerning The Loving Heart

How often have you had the experience of connecting with someone ? a friend or... Read More

Energize Your Relationship By Celebrating Hoodie-Hoo Day February 20th

What is Hoodie-Hoo Day and what does it have to do with your relationship? The... Read More

Get Lucky In Your Love Life

Whether you are single or married, we all need luck in relationship and romance. It... Read More

Did He Think of Me?

As a betrayed partner this was one of the first questions that I asked my... Read More

Are You Really Ready For a Relationship?

So often I hear, I want a boyfriend, I'm married but I'm not happy. I... Read More

Diamond Promise Rings ? For When You Mean It

Diamond promise rings are quite common, but many are not all that sure what they... Read More

How to Use Your Brain to Seduce Women

CHESS-MATEIf you're one of those guys telling to yourself that Antonio Banderas might be a... Read More

Better Than Help

One thing that women in abusive relationships and their family and friends frequently request is... Read More

He Still Hasnt Popped the Question - Should You Give Him an Ultimatum?

You've been dating the man forever, and he has yet to cough up a ring.... Read More

Coping With A New Culture: Problems And Solutions

Coping with a new culture has never been the easiest job of one's life, for,... Read More

Love or Lust

Do you know what the definition of love is? This is it: a profoundly tender,... Read More

Honesty Accepted - Deception Denied

We've all done it at one time or another, or will do it sometime in... Read More

Live Like You Were Dying: Help for Overcoming an Affair

In the recovery phase of my husbands last affair I was having a really difficult... Read More

Eight Ways to be a Better Friend

Being a good friend is a skill we can learn and improve upon. Here, eight... Read More

Travel to Find a Russian Bride

Do you agree that the best lessons are lessons given to you by other people... Read More

10 Crucial and Surprising Steps to Build Trust in a Relationship

1. Be predictable.When do seeds of suspicion emerge? When one begins to think, What's up?... Read More

The Secret Power of Romance and How It Can Work for You

There are some men who will never understand the importance of romance. They may be... Read More

Ounce of Prevention

"To love, honour and cherish", easy words to say during a fancy ceremony, but how... Read More

How A Phony Persona Always Hurts You

'Be yourself', isn't that what you've always heard? It certainly isn't ill advice considering what... Read More