Welcoming the Unexpected

As I walked my dogs recently on what "should" have been a beautiful and balmy spring morning here in Las Vegas, I was bundled up, head ducked into the wind wishing spring would hurry up and get here. It was a day that reminded me more of mid-December than early May. It also reminded me of how programmed we are to expect things to be predictable (meaning: to be as we want them to be), whether that is in matters of weather or anything else. Life is, by its very nature, unpredictable. And there is no end to the misery we generate expecting it to be otherwise.

Think about it: from the moment we enter the world until the moment of our passing from this life, we try to harness everything, to predict, control and bend circumstances to our will. We listen to weather reports in an effort to help us predict, plan and understand the weather. We attempt to schedule everything in life, hoping against hope that our supreme planning efforts will enable us to eliminate risk and unpredictability. The thinking goes that by controlling every circumstance and situation, or at least most of them, we can eventually relax and be at peace.

Don't get me wrong. There is tremendous value in organizing and prioritizing our lives. It's a necessity. Traffic and weather reports have their place. I wouldn't think of not having adequate insurance. And I also have my scheduling devices--Palm Pilot and Franklin Planner.

But somewhere along the way, we've forgotten that despite our greatest efforts to control, life is simply fraught with a certain amount of chaos and unpredictability. We find ourselves fighting what is because "it" hasn't measured up to what we, in our "infinite wisdom" have decided it should be. But stop to think about it: Has any amount of wishing the weather would change ever changed the weather? Does wanting to be out of traffic get us there any sooner?

The weather is the weather. The traffic is the traffic. The more we embrace and allow the "unexpected" to be the norm, the less we're thrown off when things don't meet our expectations. Of course weather and traffic are simply two of the minor irritations and unpredictabilities we face in a given day. But if you're going to shift your attitude to embrace the unexpected, they're just as good as anything to help you do that.

Try an experiment this week. When you find yourself fighting a situation (start small with things like the weather and traffic), simply allow yourself to welcome the unexpected. Find a way to be at peace in the situation, whether the wind is blowing in May, you're stuck in traffic or you're in the slow lane at the bank or grocery store. Take a deep breath, open your eyes, and give up expecting the situation to be as you think it should be. Instead, allow it to be as it is.

Done consistently, this welcoming of the unexpected, allowing things to be as they are, transforms the relationship between you and the present moment. Coming from this more relaxed and peaceful perspective, you suddenly begin to enjoy the late spring wind storm. Being stuck in traffic and not fighting it, you're now present enough to notice the beauty of the mountains or the flowers blooming in someone's yard. And amazingly the "emotional plaque" that builds up from angsting over things that are out of your control begins to melt away.

Don't take my word for it. This week, make it your mission to welcome the unexpected...and see what new joys and pleasures the unexpected present has in store for you!


Quote of the Week

"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift; that's why it's called 'the present.'" ~~Ziggy

Betty Mahalik has been coaching small business owners, independent professionals and leaders who want to achieve more but stress less, since 1996. Her background includes several years in the broadcasting and public relations fields prior to starting her own firm in 1987. She is an accomplished public speaker and corporate trainer specializing in communications, goal-setting and leveraging your strengths. Since 2001, she has written a weekly motivational message, free to subscribers, titled Monday Morning Coach. To subscribe or learn more about Betty's coaching and training services, visit http://www.dynamic-coaching.com

Growth From Discontent: Lifes Way Of Giving You A Little Push

That strange, gut-wrenching feeling you have is not the sushi you had for lunch. It's... Read More

How To Reduce Anxiety When Affirmations Dont Work

Have you ever read that you should think positively when you are feeling anxious?Have you... Read More

Stop Complaining

You don't need to a piece of paper to prove that you can do something!... Read More

Five Ways to Stay Positive in a Negative World

In view of the increasing negative events happening around the world here are five things... Read More

3 Ways to Change Roadblocks into Valuable Tools

Our initial reaction when hitting a setback or a "roadblock, whether it be during an... Read More

Gain Confidence By Avoiding The Trap Past Experiences Can Give You In Life

One of the biggest potential problems we face with every action we take are our... Read More

How to Deal with Discouragement and Develop Exceptional People Skills

Ever feel like giving up? Do you ever feel so discouraged that even one more... Read More

Self-esteem: Does It Really Matter?

Some people are full of confidence and able to meet even the most difficult challenge... Read More

Rebuild Those Plans

Byron and I started our first business full of enthusiasm and energy. The business was... Read More

Be Positive

This may sound quite aberrant to most of the younger generations who are not really... Read More

Deep Doghouse Communication for Angry Men

Many times when an angry or rageful man comes into the office to see me... Read More

You may be Shocked to Hear This

What I mean of course is, to appreciate life through the eyes of a child.... Read More

Beginners Programming 101

Recently a great idea popped into my head about creating a software program. Now, if... Read More

Don?t Worry, Be Happy!

Philippians 4:6-do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with... Read More

The Enchanted Cottage

Decades ago, I saw a metaphysical movie that wonderfully illustrates the alchemical power of love.... Read More

Halt All Complaining

Have you ever thought about you have a lot to be thankful for. Lets look... Read More

A Recovering Ragers Creed

A rager, or rageaholic, is a person who is addicted to the expression of anger.... Read More

How To Stay Positive In spite of The Negativity Around You

I'm often asked how it is that I stay so positive. Now allow me to... Read More

Failure is Only Feedback

Does the thought of failure send a cold shiver down your spine? Failure is the... Read More

Time To Give Up Resentment

Resentment isn't a spectacular emotion, but it is long-lasting and it easily becomes a way... Read More

Lifes Curveballs

Do you realize how good you have it? Yes, everyone has problems, but it could... Read More

Why Motivational Posters Arent Cheesy!

I don't want to say people are basically negative but?..if there was a camera and... Read More

Positive Changes Achieved by Exercising Mind, Body & Spirit

My story explains the struggles I had as a 23-year-old single, divorced mom with three... Read More

Anger: The Power is On!

When you feel lost and confused, it is easy to give your power to anyone... Read More

In The Midst Of A Storm, Theres Something More!

Have you truly tried and still failed? Have you pushed on a piece of string... Read More

Develop Yourself - The Power Within

Living without limits. Living your life to the fullest. Living with happiness. Living your dreams.... Read More

Positive Mental Attitude

Look at this glass on the table in front of you. Is it half-full or... Read More

Personal Assignments for Great Self-Esteem

Do you wish you had high self-confidence? Some of us go through our life fighting... Read More

Be Thankful for What You Have Got

Did you know that the 911 equivalent in the UK (999) now has call waiting?... Read More

Living Mindfully

Normally I race around multitasking. I am always thinking about a million things while I... Read More

A Good Joke Can Lighten the Mood

A joke is a way of getting people to laugh. It is a great opener... Read More

It Is All About Attitude!

Why do we really need the experiences that we have to deal with in our... Read More

How to Begin to Overcome Shyness

The one thing that is absolutely vital to overcoming shyness is DESIRE. You must want... Read More

A Negative Experience an Opportunity?

Early in my career a position became available which I thought I was entitled to.... Read More

Do You Neglect The Power Of Your Mind?

James Allen, who wrote the masterpiece, As a Man Thinketh, talks about the vital power... Read More

You Are A Winner!

You are already a winner, and so am I.Although you may not consider it to... Read More

Harness The Power Of Words In Your Life

Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On many occasions our words are... Read More

Universal Thought Systems/Forgiveness

Philosophy of Forgiveness:The most powerful tool that human beings possess is Forgiveness. Men and women... Read More

Positioned For Success - The Refined Art Of Taking A Chance

ARE YOU IN... OR OUT?Are you in or out of your comfort zone, that is?Remember... Read More

Anger And Your Driving

Are you driving under the influence of impaired emotions?Dateline: December 4, 2002. Orange County ,California.... Read More

Whats My Life All About?

What's my life all about is the question so many of us ask ourselves, I'm... Read More

Where Do You Get A Positive Attitude You Asked?

How are you? Where do you get a positive attitude you asked?Well, let's see...It is... Read More

Self-Confidence Secrets: Measure Your Successes

Would you like to be confident in the things you do? Most people would. The... Read More

How Important is Attitude?

We have often missed the mark because we believe we set goals too high. In... Read More


Do you realize that what we believe about ourselves, affects us so much more than... Read More

Becoming Excellent: Outsmarting Racism

Thinkers know better than to be racist. It's generally understood that racists are, well, not... Read More

3 Little Words Equal More Power To You!

Life shouldn't be so complicated. Have you ever wondered why it is? Have you ever... Read More

Universal Thought Systems #4

Before we are able to use the Universal Thought System in a positive expansive manner,... Read More

Instant Frequency Boosters: 10 Fast and Simple Ways to Raise Your Vibration

When you're feeling "low," or out of the flow, it's a sign that you need... Read More

Teens And Positive Living

If you are a parent, it is up to you to keep your children positive.... Read More