How To Develop A Grateful Mind (The Best Medicine)

There is one sure fire medicine that cures all difficulty and opens the way for your greatest good. It allows you to sleep well at night, wake up refreshed and filled with enthusiasm. Obstacles evaporate and wonderful possibilities appear. This medicine is abundantly available, has no side effects, can be taken in large or small doses regularly. You need no one to prescribe it and the more you take, the sweeter it is. The medicine is a good dose of gratitude, taken daily, at least three times a day.

or example, if you are having difficulty in your relationships, a strong dose of gratitude will help a lot. Depression and thankfulness cannot exist in the same mind at the same time. When you are continually aware of the good you are receiving, complaints, resentments and demands become a thing of the past.

Guests At A Banquet

Some would say that this world is like a banquet in which we are guests. However, instead of thoroughly enjoying the feast, we only focus upon what is wrong ? we become upset that the meal will not last forever, criticize the cook, demand one dish and refuse all others, or enjoy only desert.

any spend their time rejecting other guests, or pushing them around. Some refuse to eat the meal entirely and go to the corner to pout. Most have no idea who their host is, or why they've even been invited. They rarely think of offering thanks.

In order to live with joy and well-being, however, it is crucial to develop a grateful mind. Here are some simple steps to take. Each step is the best medicine.

Step 1: View Your Life As A Banquet ? Enjoy The Feast

Realize that we have all been invited to this banquet to develop a grateful mind. We must learn to partake of all we are offered, discover why we've been invited, and most importantly, offer thanks.

Step 2: Realize Each Person At The Banquet Is Precious

Each person at this banquet is precious and has been invited for a reason. There is something unique that each guest has to bring, including you. Find out what it is. Enjoy each person fully. If you do not know what to be grateful for, the question to ask is - what am I focusing on right now? Where is my attention?

Are you focusing upon all the problems and complaints, or are you aware of the endless gifts you receive? By taking your attention off the negative aspects of the relationship, you take energy and power away from these complaints and become open to see the good that available. As you take charge of your focus you take charge of your life.

Step 3: Take Time To Notice And Appreciate What You Are Receiving

Take time to notice and fully appreciate what is before you. Stop taking life for granted. As we develop a mind that is aware of the gifts it is receiving, the ability to give back grows naturally.

Step 4: Direct Communication

So many relationships flounder due to the feeling that individuals are not getting what they want. In many cases their partners have no idea what this is, or how to make them happy. A wonderful way to deal with this is to ask directly for what you want. Ask without criticism or a hidden demand. It is also crucial to be able to say no. Saying no is not rejection. At times, saying no to others, is a way of saying yes to yourself.

Step 5: Understand True Giving

When you give to receive something in return, this is not true giving. Some give to hold onto others, or to feel good about themselves. True giving asks nothing in return. It gives openly, no strings attached.

True giving and receiving are one. When we give fully without wanting anything in return, we receive as much as we give. Burden, resentment and clinging falls away. There is no giver or receiver here, only an open heart. In order to taste this kind of freedom, we need only let go of our demands, criticism and expectations, and simply become one with what is happening right now. Ultimately we will see that we must just open our hands if we want to be held.

C/author/2005

Dr. Brenda Shoshanna, psychologist, speaker and author is a long term Zen practitioner whose work integrates Zen and everyday life, offering a new approach to life's challenges. The relationship expert on i.village.com, she is the author of Living By Zen (Timeless Truths for Everyday Life), http://www.livingbyzen.com She is also the author of Zen Miracles (Finding Peace In An Insane World), Zen And The Art Of Falling In Love, (Simon and Schuster) and many other books. She can be contacted at topspeaker@yahoo.com

Parental Consent

Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 11, 2003I am concerned about a... Read More

When Failure is a Gift

I wanted, for many many years, to be a mystery writer. Finally I wrote a... Read More

Life Is Worthwhile If You

(Excerpted from the Jim Rohn Two Day Weekend event - June 22 and 23, 2001)1)... Read More

The River of Life

I've always loved the awesome majesty of mountains. They are, however, the byproduct of the... Read More

TIES that BIND

I have no idea how it started or who launched it. Nevertheless years after all... Read More

Giving Importance

I call myself semi-retired. I work at a job that takes up 5 hours of... Read More

Clicking to Good Vibrations!

Recently my dad visited me in Victoria, BC. He is THE most appreciative person I... Read More

What Does it Take to Make Life Better?

What does it take for you to pay attention?You've probably heard this said, or said... Read More

Eradicating The Heart of Poverty

Poverty can sometimes only be a state of mind, based on our perception and what... Read More

Top 10 Things That Make Life Worthwhile

Below are some of the things that, over the years, my clients have taught me... Read More

7 Perks to Living a Life on Purpose

1. We all have a purpose in this life time.The Mystics say each being has... Read More

The Author Within You!

I always had an active imagination when I was young. I hated school, and would... Read More

What Movies Can Teach You About Meaningful Coincidences (Use Them to Get What You Want)

When you have your dream clear in your mind and you go after it in... Read More

What is the Meaning of Life?

A young man in search of enlightenment had traveled to Tibet at great expense and... Read More

Moment of Grace

The bedrock of the Christian faith is the good news about God's love. Christian teachings... Read More

Generosity Is The Seed Of Wealth

Generosity, which includes the free, no strings-attached sharing of resources, money, and information among people,... Read More

Surrender, Complete Healing, and the Garden of Eden

In 1982, I found myself in Eden. What I found out from my brief visit... Read More

Two Choices That can Make Next Year The Best Year of Your Life

What if there were just two choices you could make to insure that next year... Read More

Are You The Master Of Your Destiny?

How strong are you? I'm not asking if you can carry 150 lbs. of... Read More

Harsh Reality

Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 25, 2003My wife and I married... Read More

Stop Trying to be Perfect

In the moment of completing a thought or action, it becomes "perfect," within our ability... Read More

The Power of the Tongue

There is an old proverb with a lot of wisdom. It says, "The tongue has... Read More

No More Frustration: The Thorns of Opportunity - Part II

The quest for the ultimate victory.In part one I shared with you how not knowing... Read More

What We Believe We Create - Love is the Creation

I once was told by the Angels that our concept of Love would fit on... Read More

Go On ! Give your Enemy a Hug

Another preposterous idea from yours truly, even the thought makes some people shudder.My husband had... Read More

The Most Powerful Question Ever Asked?

What if every experience in your life is sent to you so you can understand... Read More

Learn to Deal in Challenges

(Excerpted from the 2004 Jim Rohn Weekend Leadership Event)To really help people in extraordinary ways,... Read More

Getting Unstuck

According to the Buddhists, between January 29 and February 12 is the worst time of... Read More

Energy Work Basics Part 1: So What is Energy?

Everything is made of energy. Atoms, molecules, light, sound and color have energy. Our bodies... Read More

A Journey of a Thousand Miles

There is a Chinese proverb that says, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin... Read More

Why Should We Keep Our Thoughts Clear?

From my experience some healings come instantly or during short period of time as others... Read More

How to Pray on Water! Announcing Life-Changing Bible Code - Discover Amazing Water Scriptures!

Water is the source of life, yet so few of us understand how to navigate... Read More

5 Tips To Add More Spice To Your Life

1. Once a week, visit somewhere you've never been before. A city, town or village,... Read More

Have You Ever Felt GOD in You?

God is the primordial Creative Force that is believed to have created each atom that... Read More

The True and Magnificent Power of Giving

You've probably heard of the popular saying "It's better to give than to receive." But... Read More

A Prison Cell?

Do you have a goal? A focus in life? Have you invested a great deal... Read More

Inspiration From Jack Dempsey

I really like Jack Dempsey's great one liner: "A champion is someone who gets up... Read More

Product Testing

Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 24, 2002I suppose there are worse... Read More

5 Simple Tips On Using Your Senses

1. Breakfast in Bed.Imagine a lavish breakfast arrives brimming over with sweet cream pancakes, an... Read More

What is My Life Purpose?

Why am I here?If you haven't already asked this question, I'm sure you will. Sooner... Read More

Using Appreciation to Make a Difference

When in 1996 a local Secondary School opened, the staff decided to create a tradition... Read More

Who Is Wallace Wattles and Why Is He One of My Mentors and Heroes?

Who is Wallace Wattles? Wallace D. Wattles died over 90 years ago so how can... Read More

Create Your Own Self Esteem - Part 2

The good part of this story is that there is now hope to end and... Read More

Michael Vick is Average

Michael Vick can do wonders on a football field, but don't... Read More

The Information Age

Direct Answers - Column for the week of December 1, 2003My sister and I are... Read More

Personal Philosophy is Like The Set of The Sail

We have all experienced the blowing winds of disappointment, despair and heartbreak. Why, then, would... Read More

Increase Awareness With One Simple Question

There are many ways we can increase our own personal awareness about our life and... Read More

How A Sense Of Wonder Makes Life Richer

It always amazes me when I meet someone who has a disdain for expansion of... Read More

Today is Yesterdays Tomorrow

The problem with waiting until tomorrow is that when it finally arrives, it is called... Read More

The Power Of A Dream - Success Always Start Off With A Dream

Back in the good old days of school, the teachers would often catch us for... Read More